After being asked to retire, I discovered the stories I was told by my former assistant, who had retired voluntarily and got the retirement party and the whole package, were true.  It’s hard to retire.  Retire by its very definition means to withdraw or retreat.  After 33 plus years of working hard moving fast, going forward, and spending my every day with people who relied on me, “retreat” and “withdraw” were not words that came to mind when I awoke on January 4 and realized I had no place to go.  But the surprising revelation wasn’t about the work or the pace or the need to be needed.  The surprising revelation came a few days later when I was out picking up a few groceries for me, my wife and our son – the lone soldier still living home with us.  Driving home, a car driven by an elderly gentleman passed by me.  I’m retired but I won’t consider myself elderly.  Not don’t.  Won’t.  I am not settled into the retirement mind set even now 4 full months later.  This gentleman clearly was.  He is settled and deeply mindful of what is important.  How do I know this?  I let him take a left turn in front of me.  And the vigor with which he smiled and waved…  I was ashamed at first.  Invigorated next.  I realized that this man understood that what we make, the power we may have, the position we may hold, is all irrelevant.  What is relevant are the connections we make with the people around us.  And much to my very peasant surprise – although now in retrospect so self evident – I realized that all I have to do is go where people are, even as a driver or shopper, to make those connections.  Since then, I look to offer the waves, the smiles and the hellos I took for granted for so many years.  I celebrate the connections I make.  Especially with someone who understands the value of that connection by returning my greeting with a smile, or a wave or a hello of their own. My assistant is back to work part time.  She has found a way to quiet the loneliness and isolation by working 15 hours a week.  I want to work again too.  But in the meantime, I’ll find my connections through the kindness of others.